Post by toweringniceguy on May 18, 2007 13:33:36 GMT 10
7 Secrets of a Successful Marriage
1. Be each other's support system.
You go through many things in a lifetime. It helps to know there is someone to help you shoulder the hard times. When your partner comes to you or needs an encouraging word, give it to them. Your vote of confidence can do wonders for your partner and in turn better your relationship.
2. Be able to compromise.
By now we should all agree that people can't always have their own way. Applying the art of compromise is a healthy solution to settling a disagreement. Be willing to look for new avenues for exchange in order to make things feel fair to your partner. You might try a back rub in exchange for dish washing duty or quiet time together in exchange for a guy's night out. Compromising can help you turn your differences into new ways to discover each other.
3. Express your love in a variety of ways.
Don't just say it; show it. Don't just show it; say it. In other words, find more than one way to express your affection for your partner. Variety is the spice that keeps a marriage together. Leave a love note under your partner's pillow. Write "I love you" in lipstick on the mirror. Hide a rose on your partner's car seat. Stop and give your partner a very unexpected weak-in-the-knees kiss. Mail a hand-written love letter. Avoid falling into a boredom rut by continually striving to try and do new things together.
4. Respect each other's individuality.
Encourage your partner to participate in individual interests they may have. In fact, take that encouragement a step further and occasionally join your partner in their favorite past time. You'll be showing your partner that you not only understand who they are, but that you love them exactly how they are as well.
5. Always leave on good terms.
Life is unexpected. No argument is worth parting ways while upset with each other. If you can keep this in mind, it will go a long way to helping you put certain aspects of your relationship in perspective. Learn to value your relationship enough to never let things get that out of hand.
6. Be kind and considerate to each other.
This may seem like a given, but how many times have you snapped at your partner under stress, or made an unnecessary remark? Words and the tone in which they're used leave a lasting imprint. You can use this to make your couple memories something you will happily look back upon…or not. Long-term married couples make kindness and respect toward their partner a crucial part of their daily lives.
7. Exploit each other strengths, not weaknesses.
Think of yourselves as a team. Together you are going to try and accomplish many things from buying a house, bettering your careers, raising children and more. If you spend your time nit-picking each other about what you're doing wrong, you're wasting valuable effort that could be put towards making your dreams come true. If you were to encourage a group of employees, you wouldn't tell them how horrible they are doing. You would start with positive, motivating statements. Learn to incorporate this towards each other. Find where each other's strengths are and use them to your ability. One of you may be a more sales type personality, the other the organizer. Find out where you fit and how you can use those traits to better your team of husband and wife.
1. Be each other's support system.
You go through many things in a lifetime. It helps to know there is someone to help you shoulder the hard times. When your partner comes to you or needs an encouraging word, give it to them. Your vote of confidence can do wonders for your partner and in turn better your relationship.
2. Be able to compromise.
By now we should all agree that people can't always have their own way. Applying the art of compromise is a healthy solution to settling a disagreement. Be willing to look for new avenues for exchange in order to make things feel fair to your partner. You might try a back rub in exchange for dish washing duty or quiet time together in exchange for a guy's night out. Compromising can help you turn your differences into new ways to discover each other.
3. Express your love in a variety of ways.
Don't just say it; show it. Don't just show it; say it. In other words, find more than one way to express your affection for your partner. Variety is the spice that keeps a marriage together. Leave a love note under your partner's pillow. Write "I love you" in lipstick on the mirror. Hide a rose on your partner's car seat. Stop and give your partner a very unexpected weak-in-the-knees kiss. Mail a hand-written love letter. Avoid falling into a boredom rut by continually striving to try and do new things together.
4. Respect each other's individuality.
Encourage your partner to participate in individual interests they may have. In fact, take that encouragement a step further and occasionally join your partner in their favorite past time. You'll be showing your partner that you not only understand who they are, but that you love them exactly how they are as well.
5. Always leave on good terms.
Life is unexpected. No argument is worth parting ways while upset with each other. If you can keep this in mind, it will go a long way to helping you put certain aspects of your relationship in perspective. Learn to value your relationship enough to never let things get that out of hand.
6. Be kind and considerate to each other.
This may seem like a given, but how many times have you snapped at your partner under stress, or made an unnecessary remark? Words and the tone in which they're used leave a lasting imprint. You can use this to make your couple memories something you will happily look back upon…or not. Long-term married couples make kindness and respect toward their partner a crucial part of their daily lives.
7. Exploit each other strengths, not weaknesses.
Think of yourselves as a team. Together you are going to try and accomplish many things from buying a house, bettering your careers, raising children and more. If you spend your time nit-picking each other about what you're doing wrong, you're wasting valuable effort that could be put towards making your dreams come true. If you were to encourage a group of employees, you wouldn't tell them how horrible they are doing. You would start with positive, motivating statements. Learn to incorporate this towards each other. Find where each other's strengths are and use them to your ability. One of you may be a more sales type personality, the other the organizer. Find out where you fit and how you can use those traits to better your team of husband and wife.