Post by toweringniceguy on Nov 22, 2006 13:41:41 GMT 10
Funny Ghazal 1
Tumse mila main kal to,
mere dil mein hua ek sound,
Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho:
Your file not found!
Aisa bhi nahin hai ke,
I don't like your face
Par dil ke computer mein,
nahin hai enough disk space
Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab,
pehen ke evening gown
Too many requests se,
ho jaata hai server down
Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application,
create main karoonga
Tum usse debug karna,
wait main karoonga
Tumhaara intezaar karte karte,
main so gaya
Yeh dekho mera connection,
time out ho gaya
Ghazal - 2
Abhi abhi to pyaar ka computer kiya hai chaaloo
Aab main dil ki hard disk pe aur kitni files daaloo
Apne chehare se ruswaai ka error to hatao
Ai jaaneman apne dil ka password to batao
Woh to hum hain jo aap ki chahat dil main rakhte hain
Warna aap jaise kitney hi softwares bazaar main bikte hain
Roz raat ko aap mere sapne main aate ho
Mere pyar ko mouse bana ke ungaliyon pe nachaate ho
Tere pyar ka email mere dil ko Lubhataa hai
Par beech main tere baap ka virus aataa hai
Aur karvaaoge humse kitnaa intezaar
Hamaare dil ki site pe kabhi enter to maro yaar
Apni insult ka badalaa dekhna main kaise loonga
Jaaneman tere baap ko Shift Delete kar doonga
Aap jaiso ke liye dil ko cut ker diya karte hai
Warna baaki cases main to copy paste kiya karte hai
Aapka hasnaa aap ka chalnaa aap ki woh style
Aapke adaaon ki hamne save hai kar li file
Ghazal - 3
Imagine Guru Dutt after working for few months in Software Industry would
make a movie "software kephool" & include this song:
yeh document, yeh meetings, yeh features ki duniya,
yeh insaan ke dushman, cursors ki duniya
yeh deadlines ke bhooke, management ki duniya;
yeh Product agar ban bhi jaaye to kya hai?
Yahaan ek khilona hai programmer ki hasti
ye basti hai murda bug-fixers ki basti
yahaan par to raises hai, inflation se sasti
yeh Review agar ho bhi jaaye to kya hai?
har ek keyboard ghayal, har ek login pyaasi
excel mein uljhan, winword mein udaasi
yeh office hai ya aalame microsoft ki
yeh Release agar ho bhi jaaye to kya hai?
jalaa do ise, phoonk daalo yeh monitor
mere saamne se hataa daalo yeh modem
tumhaara hai tumhi sambhaalo yeh computer
yeh Product agar chal bhi jaaye to kya hai?
Apni Aisi Wife Hou
Apni aaisee wife ho,.
5'6" jiski height ho,
Jeans tight tight ho,
Chehra jiska bright ho,
Umar 22 se 27 ho,
Aise apni Wife ho.
Sadak per sab kaheN kya cute ho,
Bhir me sab kaheN side ho, side ho,
Pindi, Islamabad ya Peshawar ki paidaish ho,
Sas ki khidmat jiski khwahish ho
Aisi apni Wife ho.
Padosi jab baat karay to haath me knife ho,
Dinner ke waqt candle light ho,
Ham me tum me kabhi na koi fight ho,
Milnay ke baad dil delight ho,
Aise apni Wife ho.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
LARKI KA JAWAB
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
6'2" jiski height ho
Jeans dheeli magar body tight ho
Biwi ka her nakhra uthaye, itna mizaaj uska light ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho
Uff tak na kare itna quiet ho
Dinner banaye wo jab bhi romantic night ho
Shopping ker ke jab bhi aoon, bolay begum tum kitni nice ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho
Mujhay rani bana ker rakhay, to phir zindagi delight ho
Saas sussar ke samne kahay, jaan tum hamesha right ho
Hamesha jo haar maan jaye, jab bhi kabhi fight ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho
Jaha chahoon jaoon, jo chahy karoon, kuch is tarah ki life ho
Her doosray week ghoomne phirne ki flight ho
Aisa ho jaye to mein urron aasman mein, jaisay ke kite ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho
More Shers
Kon kehta hai pyaar may pakray jaeen gay?
Waqt aanay per behen bhai ban jaeen gay
Teray husn ki kia taareef karoo?tera bander jaisa mu
Teri zulfo ki kia tareef karoo?teray ek ek baal pe joon
Mohabbat mujhay un jawano se hai
Jo khatay peetay gharano se hain
Aj bagh may kali hai, kal gulaab ho ga
Mujh se shadi karlo,tum ko sawab ho ga
Itnay dino se jalanay nahi aya
Jalti hui aag ko bujhanay nahi aya
Kehta tha saath jiyen gay saath marain gay
Ab rooth gai hoon to ullu ka patha mananay bhi nahi aya.
Ghar se roz jata hai wo, Maa ko bohot rulata hai wo
Kambakht baap, Sab ko hi satata hai wo
Hathi nay kaha ja kar hathni ki kabar per
Sadqay jaoo tumhari patli kamar per
Tum bhi becahara,hum bhi becahara
Fittay mu tumhara,fittay mu hamara
Hum nay usay dekha angle badal kar
Us nay hamay mara sandle badal kar
Dil kay armaa aanso'oo may bah gaye
Un kay bachay hamay mamu kah gaye
Hum nay tumhay dil diya dildar samajh kar
Tum kha gaye is ko naswaar samajh kar
Dabbay may dabba dabbay may khargosh
Nana nay aankh mari nani behosh
Khuda karay sab haseenaao ke baap mar jaeen
Maut ka bahana ho aur hum in kay ghar jaeen
Ishq kay samander main ghota lagaya
Pani both thanda tha main bahar nikal aya
Un ki gali say guzray,ajab ittefaq tha
Unho nay phool phanka,gamla bhi saath tha
Log kehtay hain kayamat kay din marr jaeen gay
Hum bhi bohot chalaak hai,mangi thallay war jaeen gay
Wo ankh bari pyaari thi jo hum nay usay mari thi
Wo sandle bari bhari thi jo us nay hamay mari thi
Mera dil para hai loose Is ko matt karo tum use
Warna parain gay tum ko shoes
"Sahib Zaday kiya karte hain" Larki Waloon ne poocha
"Jab dekho farigh phirte hain ya tambako pite hain"
Larkay ki amman yeh bolin....kam kare us ki joti
"do bhai bhatta lete hain--abba khair se daku hain"
nakam muhabbat ka har eik dukh sehna..
.har haal main anjam se darte rehna
Qudrat ka barra anjam hai jaidi........
mehbooba ki olad ka "mamoon" kehna!
Ishq main fanni kharabi...........Munqata hi ho geya saab silsila
Is tarha toota hai un se wasta....jis tarha T.V main toote rabta
Rat ka waqt hai or masjid hai qareeb
uthiye jaldi se ke peghame amal laya hoon
ghar main hain filhal jitne bhi purane jote
aap bhi jake badal lain main badal aya hoon
or bhi chizain lut chuki hain dil ke sath
yeh batayen doston ne ishq farmane ke baad
is liye kamre ki eik eik chiz check karta hoon main
" eik tere ane se pehle eik tere jane ke baad"
bhains rakhne ka takalluf hamse ho sakta nahin
ham ne sokhe doodh ka dabba jo hai rakha hua
ghar main rakhain ghair mehrm ko mulazim kis liye
kam karne ke liye abba jo hai rakha hua
Utha kar phool ki patti, nazaakat se masal daali
Ishaarey se kaha Hum dil "Aisa" haal kartey hain
dil karta hai keh uss kay nazook hontoon koo chuum loonnnnn
magar uss kee behteee hooyee naak nay meraa iradaa hee badal diyaaa
chandni chand se hogi to sitaroon ka kiya ho ga
mohabbat eik se hogi to hazaroon ga kiya ho ga
Tumse mila main kal to,
mere dil mein hua ek sound,
Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho:
Your file not found!
Aisa bhi nahin hai ke,
I don't like your face
Par dil ke computer mein,
nahin hai enough disk space
Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab,
pehen ke evening gown
Too many requests se,
ho jaata hai server down
Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application,
create main karoonga
Tum usse debug karna,
wait main karoonga
Tumhaara intezaar karte karte,
main so gaya
Yeh dekho mera connection,
time out ho gaya
Ghazal - 2
Abhi abhi to pyaar ka computer kiya hai chaaloo
Aab main dil ki hard disk pe aur kitni files daaloo
Apne chehare se ruswaai ka error to hatao
Ai jaaneman apne dil ka password to batao
Woh to hum hain jo aap ki chahat dil main rakhte hain
Warna aap jaise kitney hi softwares bazaar main bikte hain
Roz raat ko aap mere sapne main aate ho
Mere pyar ko mouse bana ke ungaliyon pe nachaate ho
Tere pyar ka email mere dil ko Lubhataa hai
Par beech main tere baap ka virus aataa hai
Aur karvaaoge humse kitnaa intezaar
Hamaare dil ki site pe kabhi enter to maro yaar
Apni insult ka badalaa dekhna main kaise loonga
Jaaneman tere baap ko Shift Delete kar doonga
Aap jaiso ke liye dil ko cut ker diya karte hai
Warna baaki cases main to copy paste kiya karte hai
Aapka hasnaa aap ka chalnaa aap ki woh style
Aapke adaaon ki hamne save hai kar li file
Ghazal - 3
Imagine Guru Dutt after working for few months in Software Industry would
make a movie "software kephool" & include this song:
yeh document, yeh meetings, yeh features ki duniya,
yeh insaan ke dushman, cursors ki duniya
yeh deadlines ke bhooke, management ki duniya;
yeh Product agar ban bhi jaaye to kya hai?
Yahaan ek khilona hai programmer ki hasti
ye basti hai murda bug-fixers ki basti
yahaan par to raises hai, inflation se sasti
yeh Review agar ho bhi jaaye to kya hai?
har ek keyboard ghayal, har ek login pyaasi
excel mein uljhan, winword mein udaasi
yeh office hai ya aalame microsoft ki
yeh Release agar ho bhi jaaye to kya hai?
jalaa do ise, phoonk daalo yeh monitor
mere saamne se hataa daalo yeh modem
tumhaara hai tumhi sambhaalo yeh computer
yeh Product agar chal bhi jaaye to kya hai?
Apni Aisi Wife Hou
Apni aaisee wife ho,.
5'6" jiski height ho,
Jeans tight tight ho,
Chehra jiska bright ho,
Umar 22 se 27 ho,
Aise apni Wife ho.
Sadak per sab kaheN kya cute ho,
Bhir me sab kaheN side ho, side ho,
Pindi, Islamabad ya Peshawar ki paidaish ho,
Sas ki khidmat jiski khwahish ho
Aisi apni Wife ho.
Padosi jab baat karay to haath me knife ho,
Dinner ke waqt candle light ho,
Ham me tum me kabhi na koi fight ho,
Milnay ke baad dil delight ho,
Aise apni Wife ho.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
LARKI KA JAWAB
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
6'2" jiski height ho
Jeans dheeli magar body tight ho
Biwi ka her nakhra uthaye, itna mizaaj uska light ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho
Uff tak na kare itna quiet ho
Dinner banaye wo jab bhi romantic night ho
Shopping ker ke jab bhi aoon, bolay begum tum kitni nice ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho
Mujhay rani bana ker rakhay, to phir zindagi delight ho
Saas sussar ke samne kahay, jaan tum hamesha right ho
Hamesha jo haar maan jaye, jab bhi kabhi fight ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho
Jaha chahoon jaoon, jo chahy karoon, kuch is tarah ki life ho
Her doosray week ghoomne phirne ki flight ho
Aisa ho jaye to mein urron aasman mein, jaisay ke kite ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho
More Shers
Kon kehta hai pyaar may pakray jaeen gay?
Waqt aanay per behen bhai ban jaeen gay
Teray husn ki kia taareef karoo?tera bander jaisa mu
Teri zulfo ki kia tareef karoo?teray ek ek baal pe joon
Mohabbat mujhay un jawano se hai
Jo khatay peetay gharano se hain
Aj bagh may kali hai, kal gulaab ho ga
Mujh se shadi karlo,tum ko sawab ho ga
Itnay dino se jalanay nahi aya
Jalti hui aag ko bujhanay nahi aya
Kehta tha saath jiyen gay saath marain gay
Ab rooth gai hoon to ullu ka patha mananay bhi nahi aya.
Ghar se roz jata hai wo, Maa ko bohot rulata hai wo
Kambakht baap, Sab ko hi satata hai wo
Hathi nay kaha ja kar hathni ki kabar per
Sadqay jaoo tumhari patli kamar per
Tum bhi becahara,hum bhi becahara
Fittay mu tumhara,fittay mu hamara
Hum nay usay dekha angle badal kar
Us nay hamay mara sandle badal kar
Dil kay armaa aanso'oo may bah gaye
Un kay bachay hamay mamu kah gaye
Hum nay tumhay dil diya dildar samajh kar
Tum kha gaye is ko naswaar samajh kar
Dabbay may dabba dabbay may khargosh
Nana nay aankh mari nani behosh
Khuda karay sab haseenaao ke baap mar jaeen
Maut ka bahana ho aur hum in kay ghar jaeen
Ishq kay samander main ghota lagaya
Pani both thanda tha main bahar nikal aya
Un ki gali say guzray,ajab ittefaq tha
Unho nay phool phanka,gamla bhi saath tha
Log kehtay hain kayamat kay din marr jaeen gay
Hum bhi bohot chalaak hai,mangi thallay war jaeen gay
Wo ankh bari pyaari thi jo hum nay usay mari thi
Wo sandle bari bhari thi jo us nay hamay mari thi
Mera dil para hai loose Is ko matt karo tum use
Warna parain gay tum ko shoes
"Sahib Zaday kiya karte hain" Larki Waloon ne poocha
"Jab dekho farigh phirte hain ya tambako pite hain"
Larkay ki amman yeh bolin....kam kare us ki joti
"do bhai bhatta lete hain--abba khair se daku hain"
nakam muhabbat ka har eik dukh sehna..
.har haal main anjam se darte rehna
Qudrat ka barra anjam hai jaidi........
mehbooba ki olad ka "mamoon" kehna!
Ishq main fanni kharabi...........Munqata hi ho geya saab silsila
Is tarha toota hai un se wasta....jis tarha T.V main toote rabta
Rat ka waqt hai or masjid hai qareeb
uthiye jaldi se ke peghame amal laya hoon
ghar main hain filhal jitne bhi purane jote
aap bhi jake badal lain main badal aya hoon
or bhi chizain lut chuki hain dil ke sath
yeh batayen doston ne ishq farmane ke baad
is liye kamre ki eik eik chiz check karta hoon main
" eik tere ane se pehle eik tere jane ke baad"
bhains rakhne ka takalluf hamse ho sakta nahin
ham ne sokhe doodh ka dabba jo hai rakha hua
ghar main rakhain ghair mehrm ko mulazim kis liye
kam karne ke liye abba jo hai rakha hua
Utha kar phool ki patti, nazaakat se masal daali
Ishaarey se kaha Hum dil "Aisa" haal kartey hain
dil karta hai keh uss kay nazook hontoon koo chuum loonnnnn
magar uss kee behteee hooyee naak nay meraa iradaa hee badal diyaaa
chandni chand se hogi to sitaroon ka kiya ho ga
mohabbat eik se hogi to hazaroon ga kiya ho ga
Chand meri zameen phool mera watan
SupremeSohni
